I got about 1/3 of the way into a blog before I decided that maybe just keeping my mouth shut is the best course of action. At least about what I was writing about. For many years my life was an open book for readers who came down here to read the blogs, but now I don’t feel safe just talking to no one in particular. The wrong people are watching me from the shadows behind the regular readers. It’s just another way that I have been isolated from others.
I’m not enticed by wealth and power for the sake of controlling others, but I certainly desire enough so that I could simply say fuck you to all the people who nip at my heels all the time. I want to do what I want without infringing on others and not allowing them to infringe on me. Unless I sit down ant create something truly amazing it’s not something I expect I’ll ever get to experience. At this point I’m not sure I have whatever spark it takes to make such a thing anyway. I thought I did for a long time, but there haven’t been the kind of results to back that up. I guess time will tell, assuming I have enough left.
Anyway, maybe someday soon I’ll at least be able to get back to telling the actual story I wanted to. Although I have enjoyed some of the nonsense I’ve filled the times between with.