2351 Unlike Father.
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I got really emotional when I wrote this. Unexpectedly. Maybe I got closer to the mark with myself than I thought. It was just a brief, sharp, emotional resonance with my own words that came up when typing them out made them real.
Anyway, Patreon exists. his is me reminding you of it &/or Subscribestar. I don’t feel like saying much else at present.
14 Comments
As someone whose father is from the generation when this kind of mentality was the norm, yes, this does hit very close. Short, but strong, because it rings true. I’m not sure if congratulations is the right word for what I want to say, exactly, but I feel this quality of writing deserves the recognition.
Thank you for the moment of feeling and reflection you’ve given me the chance to have.
We males, we men, we sons and fathers, we always think there will be time enough to figure out how to talk about those things we need to to talk about. And then we will get to the place in our lives when there will be enough time to talk, and enough time to listen. The future, however is a destination we will never get to. The closest many of us ever get to an embrace is waving good bye.
I think one of the most incredible things about your comic is how much life you manage to breathe into them. You can really feel how much introspection he went through tonight.
It’s pages like this that make me keep coming back.
This is lovely.
This right here is why Between Failures is my favorite webcomic. Your characters have so much personality and heart. You really are a great writer.
My sympathies, I know what it costs sometimes to speak the truth.
I’m really enjoying Garret here.
And I’m closer to his age than Reggie’s, and as an adult I’ve pondered what normal emotional outlets are is for someone my Dad’s age.
In 1989 my father passed away. The last time my father said he loved me was when I was 5 in 1959. I blurted out that I loved him as he lay dying because I thought I might regret it later if I did not. I am still decades later conflicted over this. Fathers and sons sons and fathers. Your comic is one of the realest things I have ever found on the internet. You portray real life and human interactions in such a way that it makes me think and feel things. Nobody else does this. You are a master of your craft.
-ulrich
This makes me even more grateful that my last words to both my parents before they died (each individually, they died 10 years apart) were words of love. I have questions I wish I had asked, but I am glad my last connection with the people who gave me life were ones expressing how much I loved them. This comic reminds me also of why I tell my sons I love them every time I see them.
I feel ya Jackie. I snap back when I get close to my emotions, too
I like how this subtly highlights part of why Reggie thought of his father as distant and aloof, his father was like him, thus there was a resonance of familiarity with the “show your love by working” mentality. He and his father were good at the same things and had similar personalities, and thus made similar mistakes and walked similar paths. His father knew how to help him with his mistakes because he had dealt with them. Reggie is not good at the same things and has a rather different personality, so his dad didn’t know how to help him with his mistakes because they were largely of a different kind entirely. Reggie’s dad’s relationship with his father wasn’t strained because he understood his father due to their similarities, and the distance was at least partially closed by their shared talents and personalities, but Reggie doesn’t have that bridge with his dad, and his dad was just totally unprepared to figure out how to build one the hard way. He did what he could, but is probably only now realizing that that wasn’t what Reggie needed. Puts a lot about Reggie’s character into perspective.
Just realized I could have done a better job of differentiating between when I’m talking about Reggie’s relationship with his dad and his dad’s relationship with *his* father, I just don’t recall Reggie’s dad’s name so I overused pronouns. Sorry for the ambiguity.
I lost my Dad in 1986, he was closer to my brothers than to me and he too showed his affection by working everyday and setting an example for us to follow. I have “hangups” where my Dad is concerned and still am learning to deal with the legacy he left. He took on a woman with 4 children and did the best he knew and as a Dad and Grandpa now i wish all the more for what might have been. Your line of “just because we aren’t alike doesn’t mean i don’t love you” is something i wish i had heard. Thanks for reminding me that for some people, actions are the only words they know.
“The soil of a man’s heart is stonier, Louis. A man grows what he can, and he tends it. ‘Cause what you buy, is what you own. And what you own… always comes home to you.”
? Stephen King, Pet Sematary
That being said, in the midst of all that tending, it is sometimes easy to forget to enjoy that when you have. It’s important to never take that for granted, even if its in the midst of trying to do what is right. I don’t know if Garret is a good dad, but he’s trying to be, and that has to count for something.