I have seen dogs pull that crap in Petstores, but i didnt believe the stories I heard, until now. Not saying Jackie’s word is law, I trust him because he never plays “Yank the n00b’s chain.” That’s a fun thing when you can trust someone on the intarwebz to always tell the real truth they know.
Jackie, im not coming to you for medical advice, but i trust you for everything else, to the best of your ability… But also because you are skeptical, in a good way, and so are less likely to be mislead.
Full respect for you!

The only exceptional poop I have ever seen was 8 years ago, in a college restroom. It was half submerged, peeking up at me from under a metric ton of toilet paper, like a ravenous alligator. It was the width of a mega pepperoni or regular Genoa salami log from the deli.


I’ve worked retail for years, thankfully never found poop on the shelf. Clogged toilets, however, happen at least once a week.

I can attest that shelf pooping is indeed a real thing. Christmas at Dollar Tree and I’ll admit, it wasn’t exactly the gift I was expecting.

The alligator-turd that plugged the toilet and rendered it unflushable was a regul- *ahem* ROUTINE problem at my store. It went away after one of the employees was fired. I now know more than I wanted to about his ass.

If we’re sharing stories of messed up shit…

My 2nd month (so probably my… I’m gonna say 4th week) of working retail, I’m in charge of cleaning the bathrooms. I’m not sure what happened, but three walls in the big stall of the women’s restroom had fecal matter and blood on them. Almost ceiling to floor. My theory remains that a woman got so backed up she exploded. It took two hours to clean.

We are ALWAYS sharing our horror stories.
I’ve got no explanation for that kind of mess outside of physical detonation either, so… don’t eat fireworks, kids.

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