1366 Like A Diamond.

by

Reggie is forgetting to be Reggie as he thinks about this woman who meant so much to him… and maybe Evrina is too.

Some spoilers for Dragonball Z Battle Of The Gods may follow. I finally got around to watching said movie. I really enjoyed it. It felt like one of those wrap up episodes the show used to do between arcs. The best thing though, Vegeta’s reaction to Bulma being hurt. I was like “ALL THE FAN COMICS ARE TRUE!!!!” Second best thing? Shipping Trunks with Mai. She was one of the best parts of the kid Goku years. I want them to get married and have little 1/4 Sayain babies. Or whatever the fraction would be.

I had a really nice birthday supper, in spite of the fact that the site had a freak out that tons of people told me about, but my host never noticed apparently. I hadn’t seen at least one of the attendees for 6 years or so. For just a minute I remembered the world that made the comic happen in the first place. My friends are super exceptional and I miss them a lot more than I let on.

My birthday present is a down payment on some kind of tablet computer I can use to work on the move. Which I will be making payments on for all eternity probably. XD I haven’t decided for sure what thing I’m going to get, but I can’t get a Companion because they are gone, I guess. I’m leaning toward a Surface 3, since the Companion appears not to be an option. I’ve read a lot of reviews and it seems like this is the best course of action. Hopefully it will allow me to get work done faster and basically never stop working. XD Anyway, I hope it helps me bring you more, and better, content once I actually get it going.

I could of had a new TV, but I thought the computer would help me make money and then I could buy all the TVs I want later. AND THEN NEVER WATCH ANYTHING ON THEM.

The Teen wants me to put her to bed, so I’m going to do that now. I’ll see you guys in the comments.

70 Comments

Heh.

Nice going. You’ve made me relate to Reggie.

You jerk.

See, one of the things I really like about this comic is that the characters aren’t just one-dimensional: This is Reggie, he’s a jerk all the time FOR NO REASON. Instead, even the characters we don’t know all that well have their own motivations.

I hear ya, mate.

I’m trying not to like Reggie… fighting back “the feels”…
Memoirs of first girlfriend creeping back…

But in all seriousness, it’s hard to put a blanket over each character and label them with simple “like” and “dislikes”, similar to real life, because of how complex they have developed to be. That’s why I can’t get enough of this comic, either.

You just keep batting it out of the park. This is fantastic dialog and character development. I love how, just for a moment, even Evrina is forgetting to be a jerk toward Reggie.

And of course the art remains at your high standard, with characters that don’t look like each other and have natural poses.

Great work!

“I don’t care to belong to a club that would have people like me as members” — Groucho Marx

A sentiment shared by dreamers, ideologists, and those with self worth issues as much as cynics and jerks. I’ve had Reggie’s problem (at least as illustrated here) myself, for nearing 40 years now. I has cost me relationships a minimum of four times, and while you’d think I’d learn from my mistakes, every relationship I get in suffers as I wonder what this wonderful person wants with someone like me. I know for a fact this has been the demise of the mentioned four relationships, because the ladies have brought it up to me.

And it really is a death spiral in more ways than one. Confidence is essentially sexiness. lack of confidence leads to mistrust and paranoia. Which leads to less appeal, legitimate basis for worry which leads to more mistrust which leads to less appeal and etc…

The curse of the Misanthrope, perhaps? “It’s possible to love a human being if you don’t know them too well.” — Charles Bukowski

I am sorry for your repeated loss. That really sucks. :(

Given that you have identified the area you want to work on, you might be in a uniquely good position to fix it. I know that being in the 30-40 age range feels like you’ve run out of time sometimes (I’m in that band too). You’re not out of time. There are therapists who can help you work through this. You do not have to work through this alone.

Of all the areas to need work on, a lack of confidence is far from the worst one. There are … many areas that could need work which are more harmful to yourself or others. Which isn’t meant to undermine the size or frustration or difficulty of what you’re dealing with; just trying to say that a lack of self confidence does not make you a bad person or an unlovable one. And you can work through it; this internet stranger has faith in you, for whatever that’s worth.

… and if it adds any to my credibility, within the last week I asked a friend what misanthrope meant, and when they described it I was honestly surprised. Why have such a complicated word that just means “most people”? Don’t most people find most other humans insufferable? It is only through getting to know them as individual people that one can see how they’re a(n incredibly) positive impact on the earth. …. my friend told me this reaction probably means I’m a misanthrope.

This is a really interesting thread. I thank both parties for sharing. I learned a lot, as I am not outside of that category.

Also, sometimes it’s easy to mistake confidence for false bravado, and self loathing for humility, and get in the mindset that beating yourself up is a somewhat noble thing to do.

It isn’t. I’ve heard a pastor, a psychiatrist, a column editor and more than a few acquaintances over the years say that to me. Had to hear it a couple of times for it to sink in…

The lie we convince ourselves of is that we’re unlovable. There’s something special in all of us to love. Just look at Reggie…

…It took us a couple of panels, but we fell in love with him.

Wow. I think some people in the group got Reggie to tell his story, just to belittle him, or just so he would give them some cheap thrills.
Instead…Reggie’s reveal turned into a story that was sometimes painful + sad.
Ouch.

The problem with people that shine this brightly tend to burn out. The people around them are scared to approach, but they need the support more than anyone else realizes. She’s probably either amazingly rich and well with a perfect ordered life or pulling a “thomas” right now. It seems there is never a middle ground for people like this, they either shine bright or crash and burn. Or so is my experience, I am sure there are plenty of exceptions, I am unaware of them though.

At 44, I haven’t burned out yet, so I think I’m an exception to the pattern you’re describing.

I literally half-filled a large dresser drawer with blank applications that colleges sent me, due to the SAT scores I got at the age of 15, and I got an MS from Stanford at 20. Now I’m making a reasonably conventional life for myself, and I’m not currently changing the world, but I never went through a “burnout” type crisis – I just did what I wanted and usually succeeded to a degree that I’m mostly happy with.

It probably helps that I was always raised to know that, while I was exceptionally smart, there are lots of smarter people in the world; and there are lots of ways of being smart and I’m only exceptional in some of them; and there are other ways to excel than being smart; and other things more important than excelling.

Knowing I was smarter than 99% of people, but there were thousands in the world smarter than me, and character was more important than any of that, gave me a sense of perspective and kept me from either being freaked out by my gifts or trying to define myself by them.

Between having nothing to prove, and valuing people for whatever their best qualities were, I don’t think I scared very many people away. I’ve been friends with plenty of people whose IQs are probably 40 or 50 points below mine – but I have to stop and think and estimate that number as I write this, because it honestly never occurred to me before to put a number to it. This doesn’t seem any stranger to me than Arnold Schwarzenegger being friends with people far weaker than he is. I doubt very much that he cares how much weight most of his friends can bench press. Why should smarts or talent be any different?

If someone is really smart, they can probably understand the “big frog in small puddle” and “one in a thousand means there are 7,000,000 of you in the world” cautions at a pretty young age. I recommend this approach; it certainly worked for me.

Thank you for posting this- I can relate to a lot of what you say, and despite the fact that you appear to be much more well-adjusted in your attitudes than I am (perhaps partially the wisdom that comes with maturity?) it’s refreshing to see someone actually outright state something like this. Just someone reading through the comments!

Made a 29 on the ACT. Absolutely no one (at a college ) gave a damn. They essentially asked, “Paper or plastic?” Student loan or cash. Growing up in debt, I couldn’t bring myself to take out a student loan, and all the financial aid offers expected you to have your major, minor, and elective classes chosen. My heart wouldn’t let me do that, knowing that if aid was not forthcoming or was not enough, I couldn’t go. I didn’t need financial aid to help, it was that or no go. Sad to know that what I make reading meters puts me tens or hundreds of thousands ahead of a lot of college graduates in terms of net worth if they have student loans.

This is SO poignant and bittersweet… I honestly think it’s your best work to date, and that is saying something!

All this emotion from the man wearing fuzzy ears.

What do you mean, the Companion is gone? A “2015 Wacom Cintiq Companion 2” is $1600-$2000 on amazon.com right now, doesn’t look gone to me?

Oh god, my heart… Thanks for reminding me Reggie is a human being.

I can almost relate because I have self-esteem issues that basically amount to “I am worthy of no one” but because I don’t care for nor do I understand how he manifests his insecurities it is effectively impossible for me to relate to him.

I just don’t get people whose response to crippling insecurity is to come off as even greater unlikable jackasses and thus making their problem even worse.

I mean, if you think people don’t like you the natural response is to not make sure they dislike you even more.

It’s easier to hate Reggie as a jackass than understand/remember that he is human, too. Darn it.

I think this falls under the ‘Do unto other before they do unto you.’ It is a sociopathic circle of self confirmation. “I *know* I am not worth while. See? Even S/HE left me after I tried to talk to him/her.”

Also a form of self protection – if you do not let anyone in, they cannot hurt you.

One of my exes was so abused that she frequently lashed out at me to see if she pushed hard enough, would I hit her like everyone else did. I never did, but she just kept pushing harder and harder. Its a sad thing to say, but I think she left me because I would not hit her.

“I think she left me because I would not hit her.”

Nice guys are boring. How many times have I said, “I’m not him. I’m not the guy who did that to you.” Stay open; may you find someone a little more stable.

Okay, I’m sorry but this is ridiculous. PTSD is a very real thing. I have a hard time being around men on my own, because a voice in the back of my head keeps saying ‘but what if it happens again.’ It has nothing to you with you being a “nice guy.” It doesn’t matter that you aren’t him. He has destroyed her mentally, and she sees him in the face of every man she meets.

Trust me, I understand PTSD. I have it myself, from two sources (and no, I was never in the service). I’m almost 58, not repulsively ugly, make an excellent salary, and still single because women don’t want ‘damaged goods’. Don’t even dream I don’t know what I’m talking about!

“Nice guys are boring”

Ahahahahaha…
I have never been called both in the same sentence, Prof.
And no one ever calls me boring twice;
I take it as a dare, a challenge, and an open invitation.

PTSD is annoying, is all I’ll say on the subject, thank-You-very-much.

When people have been abused, they become used to it. When they finally get into a healthy relationship, it’s weird and foreign to them. It’s not what they’re used to so they get uncomfortable, and sometimes back out because of it. You have to treat them with love and kindness, and try and understand what they are going through. It wasn’t you, it’s not your fault. It’s the fault of all those who abused her before hand.

I know this. *I* had nothing doing with creating/molding her psyche. I thought then (and still think now) that if not for her Stockholm Syndrome, should would be the perfect woman. If only for me. I have zero regrets knowing her. I have nothing bad to say about her – aside from the obvious.

All I want of her is to be healthy, happy, and adjusted. To the people who did this to her…well, that’s another conversation.

I don’t think it’s that simple with Reggie…

It’s kind of like a knee jerk reaction to someone hitting you. Someone says they don’t like you, you go on the offensive, to make sure they don’t get close enough to see who you really are…and do serious damage with that knowledge.

Just another version of a defense mechanism.

And yet somehow we never make the connection that if she was willing to get naked with you, she didn’t think that she was out of your league.

Never.

An idea got into my head and I had to follow it obsessively. You would be surprised how many pages you have to go back in order to find a shot of “Nicky Greenstone” without at least her right paw (and sometimes both paws) up to her mouth. A now unconscious part of her character’s fursona or is Reggie’s sister an emotional nail biter who he’s had on the edge of mowing down on a handful of yummy Keratin “Chips” for some time now?

Reggie you’re doing this wrong. This isn’t what Evrina meant by–

Oh. No never mind, you’re doing it right, carry on.

Oh yeah! That’s right! he’s not exactly describing the experience is he?

Well, i’m sure he’ll sum it up…if they get around to it.

This sounds like Thomas’ ordeal with his ex girlfriend.

So, Ed is a young Thomas. Reggie is a young Thomas. I’m beginning Thomas is just using the store to find younger guys similar to himself to steer towards zen-like slackerdom.

…and then 70 panels later we find out he has a son who was given up for adoption to the league of assassins to train in the ways of swordsmanship, stealth, mental discipline and eco-terrorism, only to sojourn years later in the land of his father to seek answers about his past before resuming his mission to destroy the city.

Thanks a lot Reggie! Reason to hate you effectively returned! >:-)

hmmm i like this page but something doesn’t quite sit right with me so far.

isn’t that monologue the kind of things a virgin(optional) with self esteem issues who thinks he cant get the girl would say?

this is the story of his first time ergo he already had some, what’s more to the very girl he’s longing. we already know he is confident, arrogantly sometimes misplaced so (unless that’s a facade, but i don’t think so).

donMt get me wrong it is very poignant and it is very well executed so far.

i just feel like this is the wrong speech. it should feel more like regret and right now all i’m reading is longing but maybe that’s just me,

Give it a couple of pages. He’ll circle back eventually.

that’s fair. far from me to judge a whole arc based on one page. i just said how this page felt to me but it is pretty early in his speech.
either way you’ll see me back for more ^-^.

it also occurs to me that this current thing reggie is explaining is also the very core idea of your comic. the idea that someone is a failure because he/she doesn’t measure up to someone else( is this case, his object of love)

This brings up another question I had.

This ideal woman looks a lot like Nina. Shorter than her, but otherwise there is a close resemblance.

Could Reggie’s obsession with Nina be a result of this?

Jackie sometimes talks about the comments here on his twitter. Does that mean its OK for us to talk about his comments on twitter here? (I have negative numbers of desire to get accounts on sites like Facebook and Twitter but sometimes feel the odd desire to responge to them)

If you want to respond to any of my other media streams here it’s perfectly fine, but you need to actually quote the source or it won’t make any sense to me. Every so often someone will comment on a twitter post here and then it’s days before I realize they weren’t just being insane. It’s the same way on twitter. People comment about old pages there and I have no idea what they are talking about because they don’t cite their subject.

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