2375 Never Trust A Man Who Don’t Poop Secret.

by

Patreon
Subscribestar
Comic Vote
Reddit
Wiki
Holiday List
Twitter @betweenfailures
Contact me for a Discord invite.

Didn’t have anyone proofread again because I’m barely keeping my shit together over here, so feel free to point out any typos. Although, you should feel free to do that all the time really.

Yesterday the wind blew at speeds up to 140 MPH for about 5 hours give or take. It took out an old tree in the yard but it was blowing away from the house. The lawn looks like it has been scraped & the air is absolutely full of dust. It’s so bad that my sinuses are inflamed all the way down to my cheeks. There’s junk blown all over the damn place. Sill, it’s nothing compared to what happened in Kentucky, so I’ll call it getting off light and thank the stars that was all that happened.

As far as the comic goes, I’m not sure if the place I used to live was just full of assholes or if this kind of thing happens all over the place. I always suspected that it was everywhere, but there might well be places where people act better. I do know that people from outside used to comment about how awful people were in Garden. Managers from out of state were flabbergasted by how destructive the natives were. Sometimes people from my old own will contact me and ask me if I’m making things worse for dramatic effect & I have to tell them that I’m making it seem less bad because I don’t think people would believe the reality of things. I guess if you never had a job where you had to deal with the public constantly destroying things you’d be surprised if you suddenly had to.

32 Comments

Well, while there *might* be places that are better, I doubt it. There are always people who decide to be horrible. Shit in the sinks. Piss on the ceilings and walls. Things going missing. A lot of it depends on clientele, though. A specialty store, with people that don’t feel like extensions of ‘the man,’ will often have less such problems.

Very glad to hear that that tree didn’t hit your house and that things are generally okay after that windstorm, even if they aren’t great.

yeah I don’t get it either, is it so hard to behave in a way that’s socially acceptable?
I mean, if you don’t like society’s rules, then you can always fuck off in a cave or the forest lmao

For some folks it is the thrill of transgressing that is the attraction. These people aren’t going to fuck off because the rules are necessary for their thrill.

Working in the public sector, you learn very quickly just how bad people are. Having to clean up after people pissing, shitting, vomiting and injecting drugs everywhere is one thing; the constant dumping of asbestos, cleanup crews turning around to see residents filling freshly-emptied alleyways with more fly-tipping, breaking things for no good reason and trying to firebomb both us and the police is quite another.

I’m not sure who’s worse, the locals or the gypsies; the locals tried the firebombing, but we can’t even clean up near a gypsy camp without them trying to kill our operatives; one time they tried to chainsaw one of our managers to death.

I’m older than our host, and I remember a dish with hard candies (each piece stuck together in the ordinary humidity) at both my grandmonthers’ homes.

Now all I can imagine is Reggie, mogul-in-training, trying to get Megatainment to sell ribbon candy and these filled pillow things alongside the Skittles.

To be honest, I do like the strawberry candies in little strawberryish wrappers.

Speaking of wind damage, in Australia a bunch of kids took a brief flight up in the air inside an inflatable castle. Apparently this involuntary Wizard of Oz re-enactment didn’t result in any witches getting killed, but some of the children weren’t so lucky.

I keep forgetting you don’t live that far from me. That storm front raged through here moving 100 mph. The wind and rain were crazy, and my car looks like I just took it through the mud (there was so much dust in the atmosphere from the winds that it rained muddy water all over eastern Nebraska).

It’s like we can’t get a break out here. From the shitty people to the shitty weather, and who knows what shitty thing will happen next.

There is a Military Tradition of the Phantom pooper. There are Stories going back Decades regarding this. Usually in protest of whatever orders that are asinine and or counterproductive to Espirit de corps or general bullshit. Particularly among the infantry but The navy has its own legend as well.

Used to have a Scat Man in our library, the problems persisted for ages until we figured it out – it was the nice old emeritus faculty who came in always wearing starched and dry-cleaned white shirts. He was just old & didn’t have much control anymore. We felt sorry for banning him, but we just had to. Also in our shop it’s usually the Women’s restrooms that get super trashed and smeared, not the Mens. wtf.

As a Walmart associate who has been pressed into maintenance duty more than once, I concur that the women’s rooms are always in worse shape than the men’s rooms. And the two times there’s been… “evidence” on the toilets that I had to clean off, it’s been in the women’s room. (There was one incident in the men’s room, but I wasn’t maintenance that day and just had to tell management to send the guy in!)

Most of my jobs have been customer service in one way or another, with my current one being a librarian, and it really is that bad over here in the southeast. Just my librarian job alone I’ve had books shit on, called the police because a woman came in with a hammer to “discipline” a child that wasn’t hers, chased a guy across traffic who stole our summer reading donation box, and the list can go on.
It’s a constant flux of desperately clinging to the moments where you help someone who genuinely needs to lean on the library for help and writing all of humanity off as a waste of skin. I love my job, I just wish the public at large were a different species sometimes.

“And ye shall hear of wars and rumours of wars: see that ye be not troubled: for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet. For nation shall rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom: and there shall be famines, and pestilences, and earthquakes, in diverse places. All these are the beginning of sorrows. And then shall many be offended, and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another. And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.” From the Gospel according to Matthew Chapter 24, verses 6-8, 10, 12 (KJV).

If you feel that people have less and less respect for one another and more and more often doing each other dirty it is simply because they are. It is up to each one of us to fight back and to treat each other with kindness and respect. It is easy to curse the darkness. Light a candle instead. *steps off soapbox

Sometimes kindness isn’t enough. They need guidance. People who behave this way are in serious need of re-education, in both civility, respect (of both self and others) and morals (public and otherwise). Putting them in specialized institutions would get them out of other peoples’ hair and at the same time, help them get their lives back on track. It is unfortunate that we don’t have a set system that has these such facilities in place. If we did public disorder could very well be reduced in some areas.

Well, yeah, we used to. But they became “too expensive” and it was “wrong” to keep them “locked up.” So they were let out where they can be a danger to themselves and others. This is considered more “humane.”

Agreed. I’m betting money if anyone ever calculated the cost of damages and lost of life for shutting those places down it wouldn’t have been seen as so expensive.

Putting on my tin foil hat, there are two theories as to why things are getting worse now. One is that there are those who want to devalue property so they can come in and buy it cheap later on. Another is so that problems caused is an excuse to create stricter laws and gain more control.

Honestly I think those who rush to call themselves “enlightened” try to make a go at being more humane. Those smart enough to know it doesn’t always work put on the act so they can divert attention away from their true goals. Get rich and gain more power. You can only truly help those who help themselves. But what do I know I’m a cynic these days.

“I hear the human race, is falling on its face, and hasn’t very far to go.”

That’s a quote from the 1949/1940s musical, “South Pacific”.
[South Pacific is about American men + women, + others…in the SP, in war zones, in ww2.]

Not to debate with anyone- but even in WW2, + probably long before- there probably have been people preaching that everything is getting ruined, + that all people will soon be doomed.

I try not to use that point of view.
My life is more important to me, + more fun, that it’s not worth it for me, to take that attitude, + just sit in my room, feeling paranoid + sad.
[OK, I guess I’m not good at writing pep talks, but you understand my view, I imagine.]

It honestly baffles how some people can do this sort of stuff and think it’s perfectly fine. Having never been in the service industry, I’ve fortunately never personally witnessed the worst of it, but about a week ago I remember seeing the car in front of me toss their trash out the window and wishing I could confront them, not even angrily, but just with genuine curiosity as to why they thought that was perfectly okay.

I’ve worked as a janitor at a few places, including a public library, here in a small city in the Pacific Northwest, and I’ve never had to clean up feces outside a bathroom. Somebody did shit in a urinal once, and the toilets are usually terrifying in any place with much traffic, but that’s about it.

As someone who worked in a rather busy Walmart I would like to say that it’s a tiny but loud minority that are rude, insufferable, shitting in wrong places, ruining society and our faith in humanty. Most people get in, get out, and are held to the standard of civility one would expect.

Objectively, you’re probably right.
Unfortunately, the one person that uses their own feces to write “SHIT” in two-foot letters on the wall is infinitely more memorable than the thousands that just wipe and flush.

I’m just going to say where I am from, these things don’t happen, or if they do, they are scarce. That said, everywhere I have ever lived, at the time I had lived there, did not have a lot of “degenerates,” and very low crime rates, with above-average wealth, so there is that. Our town doesn’t have a homeless problem because unless they want to live in the forest or on someone’s lawn, there is basically nowhere for them to be. If someone homeless tries to spend the night here, they have to be picked up and taken elsewhere so they don’t get hit by a car or eaten by something. Furthermore, we also have rent assistance and private organizations that help subsidize living costs, so people don’t lose their homes. About two years ago, it came to my Rotary club’s attention that there was this son and mother from a nearby town who got evicted from the house they lived in for 30 years because the new owner decided he wanted to demolish it. All their stuff was put in storage, and they had to live out of their car for six months. They found a place to rent in our town, but they couldn’t afford it, but because they did what most people won’t and asked for help, our town agreed to help them with rent. The only problem was that they had no furniture and were sleeping on the floor in an empty house, so the town reached out to us to ask if we could pay to have the stuff released from storage and moved in, and we, of course, said yes. Word gets around; how a community treats people has a lot to do with how people treat the community. We don’t get a lot of trouble makers coming in because so many people are aware of how we operate. Most people don’t shit on the floor in someone’s house if they like that person. I’d like to believe that because we help people when we can, even those in similar situations that we can’t help respect us.

When I was a grocery store bagger, and thus also grocery store janitor in so many ways, it wasn’t as bad as the worst stories here. Admittedly, I only really worked there in the summer three years and for two weeks one Christmas season, and for the last year and also that Christmas stint, I was only technically on the schedule for 1 4 hour shift per week. (Lol. Like that really stopped me from working 30+ hours per week because of people calling in sick and me filling in.)

This isn’t to say that we didn’t have problems, but in all the hours I worked, I only once had to clean sprayed shit from the women’s restroom once, and only had to clean up shit writing from the women’s restroom once. The men’s room was never the problem.

Most of the time, when I cleaned up the women’s restroom, the extra mess was just a matter of far too much toilet paper put into one of the toilets, residue from toilet hoverers on the seats, and maybe some stray excrement that missed the toilet.

And yes, of course, the fecal writer did tell me about their work but claimed it was somebody else. “Um, lady, I just cleaned in there, you were the only one to use it since.” Why is that an experience that has happened to so many people?

Well, I guess maybe it could just be one person, and she’s so embarrassed each time they tell her that she moves.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.