Okay… spooky powers time. I totally got a new, huge, drawing computer screen. The biggest kind they make. It’s totally awesome. All the way to the max. It works perfectly with my computer and doesn’t crash or any annoying things at all, so I can now draw 4x as fast as before!
I also got a WiiU, but it is possesed by the spirit of William Howard Taft. Which is actually cool because he can control the second player in Mario U, so I finally have a P2. I wont even have to buy a second controller for anything because he’s a cool ghost and has the powers of a former head of the supreme court.
I also got an Ipad with the most memory they can have, but it’s an older kind so all my cords for my ipod work on it. (That might actually not be a thing that really exists… Actually there’s a lot here that it’s. I’m setting the bar pretty high for the future.) It let’s me load any movie file to it I want without converting them to anything AND has flash on it so it actually works on the whole fucking internet like Apple products FUCKING SHOULD. It also let me transfer all my save games over without being totally stupid about it and making me download 3rd party software to do something that should be a normal function.
Apple also fixed the podcast app so it works and doesn’t make my ipod all slow, and crash every time I want to search for new content. It also doesn’t spend all its time trying to play shit from the goddamn cloud. It plays it from the fucking 64 megs of memory my ipod already has that my ENTIRE mucis library doesn’t even come close to filling. It’s all there so I don’t get far away from wifi and find out NONE OF MY FUCKING CONTENT IS ON THE IPOD. WHY DO YOU HATE US NOW APPLE!? AFTER ALL WE DID FOR YOU!? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
All the fremium games stop being dicks and make their DLC reasonably priced too.
Also I met a nice girl who has her own interests but also likes some of the things I like so we can be in love, but not be all clingy about it. We have our alone time and out together time and it’s not a big hassle if she doesn’t want to watch something I like or vice versa. She has her own life goals so she’s not constantly telling me how bored she is. She’s also a super heavy sleeper so I don’t disturb her with my weird schedule. And she has cute ears.
The list is getting a little esoteric and impossible. Better stop while I’m ahead.