2683 Down From Heaven.

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There was a time when I would just say what was on my mind a not worry about how it would be taken. Now I sit here before posting most pages deciding not to say things. Maybe it’s wisdom, or perhaps a feeling of futility. As time goes by it feels like wisdom is often informed by understanding futility. People say that reaching out to others is most often the best course of action, but it’s been my experience that asking for help, understanding, and many other things, really just opens you up to attack. Many people just rove around the internet looking for weakness to attack. Damaged people, hurt people, impotent people, looking to get a feeling of power from hurting anyone, just so they can feel like they aren’t living a completely pointless existence. Lashing out so that other people can feel their pain too. Maybe it would be good to give them a target. Maybe that’s the societal function of a lolcow. The village idiot that it’s okay to torment. An outlet for the hate that lives in the heart of every creature to one degree or another. People ache for purpose and will take whatever they can get when no true enemy
presents itself.

For now I think I’ll keep myself to myself. If that results in random monkeys assaulting others then I apologize for not fulfilling my function. Maybe I’ll get back to it later on. In any case I hope you who do not hate me will return on Monday, having had a nice, safe, weekend. Until then I will simply smile knowingly at you and nod.

15 Comments

Reading the blog, I’m sort of sad you feel that way nowadays, Jackie, even if I understand where you’re coming from. I always liked reading your notes, snippets, random thoughts and whatever else popped on the blog, always been into these little windows to the people who make stuff I enjoy.

This goes doubly so in this case since you have always shown yourself to be a sensible person who just seems to want the best for everyone, and who seems to have the rare disposition to acknowledge the good even in… Difficult people. Despite the occasional (and reasonable) moments of waryness at the state of the world, these human (and humanistic) qualities have given me much respect for you not just as an author, but as a person, even if one seen through these snippets.

I sort of rambled there, I guess, but I set out to write this comment to let you know I’ve learned a lot reading the blog over the years. It has given me some valuable insights into people, helped me develop my people-reading skills. I hope we get to a point you can feel comfortable sharing your thoughts with us again someday. It makes the work richer to me, to know a bit of the person behind it, and I enjoyed the opportunity for interaction, limited as the format may make it. As always, thanks for doing what you do!

Can I say I also agree with Oderbran? Okay then. I agree. And well-put as well.

That being said, you be you Jackie. I reckon it’s up to you alone as to when and how far to leave your comfort zone.

I’m sorry you feel the urge to remained closed, and I hope it’s nothing of concern. Until Monday, God willing.

The term “lolcow” is something that no member of the autistic community wants to be branded as. Once you’re branded that label, your identity is officially reduced to that as an object to serve other people’s mockery, belittlement and amusement.

It’s a mindset that seriously needs to die.

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