1261 Diplomat.
Turning on my PC to post this page is the first time it’s been on in two days. I’ve been on the road a lot. It’s pretty uncommon for me not to at least check my mail when I get home, but I left, got back, went to sleep, got back up, went out again, in rapid succession. All the actual stuff done ran together. It was also horrifyingly hot most of the time. At the moment I feel quite unwell, likely as a result. The reason for the rushing around was that the Teen went to a baseball game very far away. There are many activities that needed doing that she is a detriment to when involved, so we endeavored to complete these tasks while she was away. It is very difficult to bring here some places. Sit down resturants, for example, throw her apparent wolven upbringing into stark contrast. Since we don’t like a lot of spit in our food we quickly learned not to take her to such places.
Never, and I mean never, irritate the people who are making your food. It’s one of my cardinal rules, yet people break it so flippantly I can scarcely believe it sometimes. I’ll give you that poor service certainly should be pointed out, but only after the food is in your hands. Unless your complaint results in a smattering of terminations you can never return to a place where you’ve vociferously complained about food. Complaint, in most circumstances, should generally be done politely, in my opinion, but especially when it comes to food preparation. If you’ve come to the point where your anger takes control be prepared to commit to burning the bridge. Make sure you are willing never to step across the threshold of the establishment again. (Or at least until the turnover replaces all parties involved save oneself. XD)
I feel like Carol is one of those people who’ve consumed a certain amount of unintentional saliva. Her attitude is sometimes more strident than sensible. Ed also strikes me as such a person. They both strike me as people who sometimes forget that it’s important to pick your battles carefully AND consider the timing of said battles.
58 Comments
My fiance:
“If you get want you want, and the other person gives it to you, and you don’t have to kill anyone, that’s diplomacy. Words don’t win wars. Bullets do. That’s why you have armies instead of assault diplomats.”
Assault Diplomats sounds like a good name for a band.
Seconded.
All in favor, say “Classy”.
Ooh! Now I’m interested in politics!
Ever read Retief of the CDT? He could be called an assault diplomat.
Militant Agnostics will play support.
Assault_diplomats.tumblr.com
“Words don’t win wars. Bullets do.”
And the basis of this argument is…?
Poor Shamu.
This just in, a human species by the name of “Carol” just assaulted Prime Minister Shamu in his home-world of Sea-Galaxy Prime. She ran around the space station screaming “Take no prisoners!”. This story and more at 11.
Do you think they’ll call it Shamugate?
Guys, she’s obviously inspired by Free Willy.
You’re inspired by Free Willy.
You should have Sloth Astronaut as the only one on the Council that supports Carol, lol.
Pic here: http://i.imgur.com/tqE84.jpg
I do enjoy a good sloth.
With fava beans and a nice Chianti……….
I think aroused was the word you were searching for.
relax, its cool! in the 3rd installment, she’ll be able to take a FreeWhalian paramour after she cures their crippling illness.
i would honestly pay to see a webcomic centered around mass effect, soo much fun could be had.
Maybe I’ll do a spin off. XD
this.
This.
THIS.
“THIIIIIIIIIIS!!!!!!!!”
All of my this.
Awesome idea! ….. well if by awesome you mean you will be stretching yourself like Mr Fantastic and so thin that kids can use you to do shadow puppet plays.
By all means write the scripts since I know that will be fun no matter what.
Don’t know Mass Effect form Pac-Man, but if there’s a Carol equivalent, I’m there.
Mass Effect is a thing I don’t know about. I’m just kind of riding this one out.
Hopefully the deeper concepts presented aren’t beyond your grasp.
AKA Kirk/Sisko style diplomacy.
COMPLETELY with you when it comes to not p!ssing off people who make your food in restaurants (I’ve been on both sides of that as there was a time when I worked at a pizza place to pay tuition and rent). First of all, YOU DO NOT WANT YOUR FOOD SPAT IN OR WORSE (you do NOT want to hear about the “worse” part). Secondly, most food service people in the U.S. are paid minimum wage or even less, depending on their job title. Food service and waitstaffing is a thankless, low-paying, high-pressure job that gets even more unbearable when you have nasty customers. And, in many cases, what people call “poor service” happens because the restaurant is understaffed and there literally aren’t enough people working to fill orders or because the management announces a nearly-impossible service rate (it’s been MANY years since I worked food service but I’m still kind of bitter – can you tell?) :P Anyway, thanks for being considerate and I love the comic! :)
Can’t stress this enough, especially about the need to recognize the difference between poor service and poor staffing. The first is actually relatively uncommon–not unheard of, but most bad waitstaff don’t last long, because they don’t get tips, so they move on. The second happens all the freakin’ time. Especially in diner-level restaurant chains like Denny’s, you can usually observe the waitstaff. It’s rare that they are just sitting around chatting, especially if you are not getting served as fast as you usually would. Instead, you’ll see them running around trying to cover more tables than they should, because the skinflint manager opted to trim two positions off of each shift.
Being influenced by your comic to try MassEffect
In spite of the controversy surrounding the 3rd installment of the series, Mass Effect is a masterpiece. Flawed, but still one of the best games of all time.
DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT!!!
Awesome games, despite the occasional flaws. Hell, if you ignore the last five minutes of game three, I’d be willing to say it’s the crowning masterpiece of the series. It’s a very cohesive story, and the story-based DLC is largely worth your time (and, admittedly, money). If you want to mess with the appearance DLC, that’s your call, but they usually don’t add much.
I wish this were an option more in the first game. With all the human bashing in act 1. Makes me want to punch a whale.
Also as an extremely sanguine person, I agree with the rationale for Carol and Ed. Discretion is NEVER the better of valour. They will never take our freedom! Let’s blow this popsicle stand. Kumquats.I dunno!
Dayaum, girl! And to think, that “POW” was the blue option…
Carol definitely needs to partner up with, I dunno, Rocket Raccoon…
I’m very calm with restaurant servers when there’s an issue. It’s not the server’s fault, after all, they’re just trying to make their minimum wage + tips (mmmaybe) income. I’ve had my fill of Give-A-$#!+ cooks, though. When I say no onion, I mean no onion, dammit! When I get burned by a restaurant, I calmly go home, log into yelp.com and knock their @$$es out with the keyboard.
This….
“Carol definitely needs to partner up with, I dunno, Rocket Raccoon…”
I’ve never played one of them Mass Effect games, and from what I’ve been shown by my friend, it looked pretty tedious… all he ever did was dig into planets for resources. But this story arc makes it sound pretty hilarious.
Anything I can wrap my Chaos around, I will.
Up until the third game the series had a huge problem with tedium. In one you had to drive to your missions and explore planets, which was fun most of the time, but there were so many essentially empty planets you had to scour for resources. In two it was reduced to scanning planets, which was also fun at first…
All the stuff in between was awesome though. XD
Looks like Carol mastered renegade interrupts in just 2 panels!
Anyone else want to negotiate..?
Did you just quote Bruce Willis?
I did…
Cowboy diplomacy?
Find a pool and Ride’m, Cowgirl!
Did Carol just punchout Slamu from the Street Sharks?!
I actually had to look that up because I didn’t remember there being a whale on the show.
Actually I was a little mistaken your character looks more like Moby Lick a killer whale with a longue tongue from the show, but still Carol punched a streetshark you don’t wanna mess with that.
Moby Lick had better either be a porn star or the name of a porn. If not then I just don’t understand this world anymore.
FIRST of all, this is the funniest comic you have ever posted in my opinion. Look at the Orca’s face in panel 3. He is the DEFINITION of distraught. It honestly made me fall out of bed.
SECOND of all, this comic reminds me a lot of this Penny Arcade comic from, like 8 years ago: http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2006/05/24
From this we can conclude that people getting hit unexpectedly is very humorous. That is all.
That guy was one of the things about Penny Arcade I was never sure about. Was he supposed to be an analog for a real enemy of theirs? Was he one of the other characters that… did stuff randomly in their universe? Its lack of cohesive continuity confused and angered me. Of course, 8 years ago I was aware enough of their culture to understand the comics, now they’re almost always a random collections of words that I feel like should be funny… If only I had whatever pamphlets went along with them. Regardless, I’m glad you enjoyed this page.
I know! A lot of the comics NEED the corresponding news/blog post that they wrote along with it to really make sense, but when they switched over to their newest layout, they lost a lot of those older posts, so everything is just a collection of images. It’s like hieroglyphs of a bygone era, which we can only guess as to its true meaning.
And as far as Franzibald goes, I hold with the theory that he represents the creator of that comic Ctrl+Alt+Del; in truth, I always preferred Penny Arcade, even when I didn’t really “get” it, because it’s so much prettier to look at than C+A+L. The art is often their saving grace when I don’t follow a confusing idea, especially when they mix up the art styles for spin-off stories.
Holy shit, did you really just use a herglic from star wars?!?!
Everyone knows expanded universe isn’t real.
I actually had to look this up. I have a pretty deep knowledge of offshoot Star Wars stuff, but I had no memory of whaliens. It’s kind of fitting though, I chose whales as the Krogan knock offs because it’s the laziest, most deviant art furry, idea I could think of. Expanded universe never fails I that respect. XD
Is it bad that I’m working my way backwards through the comic to find where I left off and already knew which game you were basing it off of the moment I hit this page?
Yes?
I don’t know what’s funnier, Carol’s “Diplomacy” or the fact that you made the Krogans Space Orcas.