1753 Gun Safety.


This is based on a real thing. They always said the guy shot himself accidentally, but its possible that he did it on purpose. It was apparently hard to tell for sure. In either case he was a dick. Went through six years of school with him and he was always a dick and there was no reason anyone could see except that’s just who he was. In retrospect he was not having the Asperger’s. He did not act like a dick in that way. It’s sometimes hard to make that kind of a call, but in his case it was not that way because he was fully aware of what a dick he was being and loving it. This is after years now of being around people who identify themselves as having Asperger’s. Their dickish behavior has this feeling of “I did what now?” instead of “Ha ha! Fuck you! Fuck you! You’re cool! I’m out!” That’s basically my shorthand for deciding if who I’m dealing with is “on the spectrum” as they say. Of course a lot of the time they tell you in the very first interaction if they have trouble identifying social cues, because the world is different now. This is much easier.

Sometimes people ask me if I’m “on the spectrum” and I’m like “no.” I’m pretty aware of the emotions of others. Hyper aware in fact. I have an almost crippling level of empathy with other beings. Sometimes even with inanimate objects. If there’s a reverse version of not being able to read social cues and having empathy that’s what I have. I do sometimes use words in ways that make people mad because my understanding of words is very nuanced, so when someone uses a word in a certain way I may react wildy differently than what they expect because their word choice has many subtle levels of meaning to me that they do not grant those words. I think this may come from the number of words I know compared to most people. Also my family seems to use some words in a very specific way that is not common to the outside world. It goes at least as far as my first cousins because I hear them doing the same kinds of verbal things while their partners don’t until many years of being together. So the way we talk is kind of viral and we impose it on the people around us. A weird specificity of language that has many subtle layers of meaning based on word choice, tone, and context. Since I’m hyper aware of this sort of thing I notice the differences between my family and other people. I think I could have been a good linguist because I really pay an abnormal amount of attention to how people talk.

I also adapt to the speech patterns of new people if I want to infiltrate their group but use my own style if I want to stay out of it, or take over the group.