I may switch to doing some filler pages for a while after this page. I haven’t been able to keep up with things nearly as well as I had hoped. Grandpa has been in my care on and off since the funeral. Mom has had him part of the time at his house in kind of a week on week off basis, but she’s also trying to work out the paperwork for his extended care situation & it’s a big governmental clusterfuck, like everything to do with things they involve themselves in. I’ve had a couple of days where I couldn’t get to sleep at all & got dizzy to the point I was almost nonfunctional. Grandpa has this weird ability to sense when I fall asleep and he comes and pounds on my door like he’s dying. It’s fucking insane. He’ll sleep in his chair, or graze on the snacks I have for him all by himself, but as soon as I actually fall asleep for a second he dashes down the hall to wake me up. It startles me awake too, so it shoots my anxiety levels to the max level which I have trouble shutting down.
He’s also started wandering around a bit, so I need to remember to lock the doors and gates. It’s a new thing I’ve never seen him do before, which worries me. He was asking for his keys so he could drive home, which is also new. It would be a disaster if he decided to wander out of the gate. Not only would he get lost, but so would our dogs.
Anyway I’m having a really abnormally hard time focusing on things I need to do. What is it the kids call it now? Executive disfunction? I actually had to write this page 10 times, which is extremely abnormal for me. I can usually decide on something in two or three passes, even if I’m having trouble, but this just fell apart in my head over and over & I couldn’t get a handle on it. I’m not even thrilled with what I landed on, but at least I didn’t break a leg when I did.
Anyway, Patreon, subscribestar, paypal, are things to remind you about.

Posts authored by Jackie

2403 Validate Shunned.