788 Boobie Doo.


I got sort of angry the other night about toys.  Angry in a way that only a nerdy, loser, collector can get.  Living out here and not even having the option to look at new stuff is aggravating.  It’s not like I intend to buy lots of stuff, but not even having a shot at the few things I would like pisses me off.  At this point all I really want is to have a decent representation of most of the G1 Transformers.  I already have some of them, so it’s just a matter of waiting for the holes to be filled.  Of course if they never file by then there’s no chance.

I missed out on the Cosmos they released a while back, which really sucked because I liked him a lot as a kid.  He was one of the few original toys that survived.  On some level I’m okay with not getting what I want.  Which was facilitated by several things being released as club exclusives, or what have you.  The breaking point was the Universe mold seekers.  Seekers being the term used for the evil jets that are the same toy painted different colors.  Starscream, Thundercracker, and Skywarp were the first 3.  Later on they added Ramjet, Dirge, and Thrust.  (The later 3 actually had remolded parts that helped further differentiate them from the original seekers.)

Anyway, Hasbro made a Starscream, and eventually a Skywarp that came with a repainted Optimus Prime.  This was something like 5 years ago mind you.  The hope was that they would release a Thundercracker and the original team would be complete.  I have some sort of compulsion when it comes to those 3 characters.  I need to have all three of them in matching molds.  Hasbro has made a habit of making any two of them in a given mold and then never going back.  Eventually it broke me.  And I understand why they are loathe to release the same mold 3 times in different colors.  Sane people think it’s bullshit, and it IS.  But nostalgia is a mighty force.

At some point they released a set at a convention, or some such thing, of the seekers.  They might have even added the Johnny come lately Sunstorm, or whatever the fuck he was called, that was a bright yellow guy seen briefly in the old show and expanded upon by the jackoffs who write the comics.  David Willis references the fan “outcry” over the affair in one of his comics.  Which I am too lazy to look for.  Also fuck him.  He doesn’t need hits from me.  But I digress.

After that, and with the onset of the films, I was able to get out of the completist mindset.   Because the movie toys suck on average and the retro ones are released all slapdash as filler between movies.  I pick and choose now.

I keep losing the thread of my tale in the stream of consciousness…  Okay, so, they released a recolor of the seeker mold that was painted to look like a G2 seeker.  I passed it over and looked on it as kind of a slap in the face, since all I really wanted was Thundercraker.  After that I think they released Thrust.  I passed him over for a long time, but eventually I caved when I saw that they were going to make at least one other of the second seeker team.  I seem to recall it was Dirge.  It kind of rekindled hope that I might get my Thundercracker and I’d never have to buy there 6 assholes ever again.  Time passes and Ramjet appears.  The burgundy one.  I may have the names inverted.  So I’ve got 5 of the six.  I fully expect I will never get a Thundercracker at this point unless I break down and order an expensive import from some douchebag specialty store and have to pay as much as 3 toys for it.  Which I can’t bring myself to do.

The sadness of all of this is not lost on me by the way.  I am SO APPRECIATIVE of the fact that this sort of nonsense counts as a problem for me.  In a world where disaster strikes at random and people starve in the streets I count myself blessed and understand exactly how stupid all this shit is.

Eventually I find out that Hasbro did release a Thundercraker AND it was in a wave that was skipped over in favor of the latest batch of tightly coiled movie shit.  And I’m like >:|    So I go on a hunt around the net to see just how deeply buttfucked I would get if I tried to complete this Seeker set at long last.  The answer is, of course, all the way to the pubes.  If you can find him at all he’s getting close to double shelf price or worse.  I had all but given up until I saw a place selling a 3 pack of guys from that wave at a relatively decent price.  I totally wanted the other guys too, so I dropped my commission rates really low to pay for them all.

Warpath, Wheeljack,  and MOTHER FUCKING THUNDERCRACKER.  Mission complete.

It strikes me as odd that the other two are W names…