1652 A Big Thing.


Maturity is important in all relationships, unfortunately humans have to work up to it, assuming they get there at all.

I had a friend who started being sexually active at 12 or so. He and a different friend had a few sexual adventures together. He told me about several of them over the time we were friends. He always got this middle distance stare when he told them. In retrospect I wonder if he was bisexual, but at the time that wasn’t a big thing in the popular consciousness so I never made that connection. He very much liked women, but he was very close with the other male friend. I ran around with their group for a few years, but was never really as much a part of it as the others. I think that’s why he would tell me the stories. I was an outside voice to bounce the words back to himself off of. I don’t know what happened to him, but he always seemed to be looking for something more than what he had at any given time. Looking for something that would make him complete and happy. I put a bit of him in John. John is very much an amalgam of men who seemed to be looking for those kinds of nebulous things. One of them actually seemed to find what he was looking for, but of the many men I’ve known with this kind of personality there has only been one who made the transition from seeker to enlightened.