293 Does It Hurt?


After I got my Wii I spent a fair amount of time perusing the downloadable content for the virtual console. A lot of the games seem a little pricey for the same old shit they’ve been pushing on us for all these years, but whatever. I guess Nintendo holds its outdated stuff in pretty high regard. At any rate, I decided to get Super Castlevania IV. I never understood why they called it IV. It’s just a remake of Castlevania. Super Castlevania would have been enough. Any way, it was one of my favorite SNES games, and they still haven’t given me Earthbound, so I just went with it. I seem to recall being good at the game, but apparently I’ve lost my touch in my old age. My ass was being handed to me by things that often times had no hands with which to accomplish such a feat. Be that as it may, I still had fun. I even broke out the old Tome Of Codes and jumped right to the end of the game. I was all “Hey Dracula, remember me!? I’m here to kick your pre frilly-collar retcon ass, and incidentally, I’m all out of gum!” Yeah, he seemed confused too…