1476 Vaguely Christian.


Honestly, I can’t really get my thoughts together enough to wax poetic about religion down here. I don’t think there’d be much value in it anyway. I’ll let these two go over anything I might want to say as the conversation unfolds.

As far as me goes, I’m good on pages till Friday. I’ve been feeling shitty during the daylight hours, when I take my meds, then feeling normal-ish at night. So my days and nights are almost completely reversed now. I stopped taking the antidepressant because one moring I woke up in complete terror with visions of horror being displayed to me on the back of my eyelids. It lasted for several minutes and agitated me quite a lot. For the rest of the day it was like my old depression switch was turned back on. I was crying at random for no reason, had feelings of intense grief, and was having repetitious thoughts. I’m still not completely right. Little flashes of intense emotion keep washing over me at random. Hopefully I can right myself again in a day or so. It’s put me right off of medications though. I really don’t like my brain being a playground for experimentation.

It’s pretty fucking annoying because I was doing better before I went to the doctor and I wasn’t doing great then. In contrast though it feels like I’ve been set back months. If nothing else my foot seems to be staying the right color most of the time. Maybe the blood vessels are healing up. Hopefully I’m losing weight from the loss of appetite panic brings too. Silver linings and all that.

Anyway, I’ll see you guys back here on Xmas day, late if you come at all. Stay safe if you’re traveling. I don’t want any names to stop appearing in the comments this year. Believe it or not I do come to recognize usernames and notice when they stop appearing. No matter what you believe know that I appreciate your presence, and hope only the best for you and yours.