There’s a saying that goes “How did (event) happen? Slowly at first, then all at once.” That’s how falling into a fandom happens a lot of the time. You stumble into a thing that looks interesting, then one day you’re wearing all the merch at a convention. I’ve always been on the outer rings of furry fandom. Mostly art, no fursona. I don’t identify particularly with animal traits. Unless my spirit animal is just a human. Maybe my fursona is just me but better looking. Regardless, until about 7 years ago I always found the “furry community” very inviting. Over time that has become less and less true as social media divided everyone up more and more. Unfortunately in recent years I’ve found furries in general to be just as awful as everyone else now. In reality no community is a monolith, and it will evolve over time, but it’s sad since, in spite of the relentless shit they got as one of the last groups it was okay to hate, they generally remained open and inviting. It might also be that the founding beings of the fandom are beginning to die off. I’ve had several friends pass away in the last decade who were well know community members. The voids they left were filled by beings of less open mindedness.
At this point I’ve become accustomed to not being welcomed anywhere, so it’s no great adjustment. Another door is closing and time moves on, as do I. Doing what I want to do and letting people join up with me if they decide they like it works out better in the long run it seems like. I have no desire to do anything but exactly what I want and if that’s a problem for an observer I don’t have a solution for them other than to simply move along. My personal freedom is something I value very highly and I am loathe to give up any of it. I would much rather die than be forced to live any way than exactly how I choose to. I’m not a happy person by nature, but living like that has gotten me as close to being happy as I’m capable for the longest time. If you’ve got the guts to put everything on the line to live that way I say go for it. As long as what you want infringes on the rights of no one else then why shouldn’t you be able to live how you want, or die in the attempt?
Why even multinational brands like Nike encourage you to “just do it”. My guess is what they want you do ‘just do’ is buy their products and anything else they care little about, but they sort of encourage a bold lifestyle, I guess… Live bold, live loud, do the dew, realistically just words to get you to consider buying stuff, but you can choose to actually do the dew, and interpret doing said dew as living by your own personal code. I dunno. It’s whatever. Give it a shot. Let me know how it goes.
My results have been mixed, but still probably better than if I had just lived like your average schmuck. Which is not to say that if you’re an average schmuck enjoying the average schmuck lifestyle that it’s wrong. If the average schmuck life chose you then you are more than free to answer that call. Live the schmuck life the best way you can. Death is coming regardless of what you do so you might as well do whatever suits you best.

I certainly hope that at least one aspect of what suits you best is supporting my work via the links above. It’s a big part of why I can live my weird goblin life in relative lack of extreme misery. Which I certainly appreciate. To those of you who already keep the lights on I must, as always, extend my heartfelt thanks. In any case it’s 16 minutes past my preferred posting time so I will end my ridiculous rambling, and wish you a pleasant life until such time as we can meet again.

Posts authored by Jackie

2586 I Am Cringe, But I Am Free.