2632 Mammalmax.

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You know, I really let this conversation get weird. I find it extremely amusing, but this isn’t exactly where I saw this going when I started. XD People seem to be really enjoying it though, so whatever. Let’s celebrate our mammalian superiority.

I’m still on this weird sleep schedule where I want to go to sleep at, like, 8PM and I wake up all anxious and freaked out a lot of the time, but during the day I’m mostly feeling “normal” for me anyway. I can’t seem to fall asleep to my usual podcasts and stuff recently, which is just odd to me. It happens every so often but it hasn’t happened quite to this degree in a very long time. Used to there would be content that kind of filtered in over time and mitigated it a little but with algorithmic meddling it seems to have crippled this natural flow I had going for over a decade. It’s also possible that the kind of people who made the kind of content I used just aren’t producing anything because there’s no benefit. Since so many revenue streams have been gutted by the big tech strangle hold of monetization new creators aren’t doing the things I generally like. I really miss the wild and free version of the internet from when I started. It was easier to find your place. Which is saying something because it wasn’t that easy then either.
But that’s as may be I guess. I guess I should remind you, or perhaps inform new readers, that there re links to support my work above this post. I hope you will find my efforts worthy of your patronage. The weekend is upon us, so keep an eye out for the forces of evil, and please return to me on Monday for more of my usual nonsense. Until then, good journey.

20 Comments

“Enjoying the mammal experience” sounds like a movie you can’t show kids.
“Enjoying the mammary experience” would also suffer the same fate.
“Enjoying the Mamal experience” is just Rick Steves visiting west Iran.

“Mammals” are categorically defined by the mammaries. Thus, humans, always having the titty ready to go, are the mammal-est mammals. Clearly.

Humans are high in the mammary rankings, but I’m not fully convinced they’re the top. Cattle produce six gallons of milk a day. Humans aren’t hitting near those numbers.

Ok, so I had to. The average amount of milk a human can produce is a liter, which is .264 gallon. The average human female in the US weighs 170 lbs. A cow produces 6 gallons of milk, and weighs about 1000 pounds. This makes a Cow about six times heavier than an average human woman, but they produce around 24 times as much milk as a human, so cows are better milk producers than humans… BUT there is a spanner in the works. That spanner being that cows have been selectively bred for millennia to produce more milk. Humans specifically bred cows for milk for at least 8 to 10 thousand years, which has likely expanded their ability to produce milk massively. Now, I can’t say that cows weren’t naturally better at producing milk than humans, but since we are largely responsible for the level of milk production cows have reached, I would say that we still mammary-maxed better than any other species, we just did it to a species we domesticated. Additionally, if we are talking breast tissue as a percentage of body weight, I would argue that humans are likely the reigning champions, since my wife’s large but not ridiculous looking chest weighs about 20 pounds, or roughly a tenth of her body weight. I imagine Carol’s (for an example we definitely all understand), weigh about 25 to 30 pounds, I’m estimating about three fifths of her weight. That’s insane, honestly, but still believable in humans.

Well, I hate to endorse eugenics, but we need to get those numbers up and show cows who’s boss. It will require decades of selective breeding, but it seems like we’re going back to that kind of thinking again, so we may as well go back in with a worthy goal.

Well, there’s also a matter of diet and lifestyle. Dairy cows exist to produce milk, and their entire lives have been tailored towards that. I suspect that a few supplements and a planned diet to strongly impact a human’s production.

But, have to question if there’s really a demand. Some demand, yes, but on the scale of the dairy industry? Been a few decades since I tasted human milk, can’t say I recall as to how the flavor compares.

I’m in a similar sleep rhythm myself now for several months, I go to sleep at 1030-1100, then wake up at 0400-0600, wander about a bit, then sleep for two more hours (usually). I think it averages out at 7 hours but isn’t as restful as getting 7 straight hours. In fact, I usually feel more alert at first wakeup than second. I suppose that’s circadian rhythms for you.

Try listening to Big Clive. Either his electronic teardowns or his livestream on Big Clive Live. His voice is very soothing, and I often find I’ve missed several while snoozing.

Bob Ross’ TV show, The Joy of Painting, is pretty relaxing, too.
You could put a number of JOP episodes on “play all”, + fall asleep to a few hours of JOP.
Hm.

You and me, baby, aren’t nothing but Mammals, so lets do it like they do it on the Discovery Channel.

Sorry, I couldn’t help myself…..

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