1406 Or Are They?

Well, I’m back. I’m still not fully recovered, but I had enough time to build a little buffer and, godwilling, I won’t have any more major health problems and caqn get back to working properly. I’m working through a month or so’s backlog of stuff I was supposed to do, so please be patient with me. I also have a story for another Muffintop anthology that I committed to, which has qa deadline I need to meet, so I’ll be putting that ahead of things as needed. That said, please feel free to send me your requests for things you earned via Patreon, or the go fund me. I can plan better if I have an idea of what all I need to do. I promise not to let myself get overwhelmed. (Mostly…)

At some point I’ll get back to putting drawings on Ebay, but for now I’m going to focus on anyone who wants one from the go fund me thing. AND the ones I was working on for Patreon when I got sick again.

Right now I can go out for a little while, but it becomes a race against time to get back home. I start to lose power at a little under 30 minutes, less if I start to overheat. It takes about 15 just to get to town and my truck doesn’t have AC. In the daylight I can’t even get to the overpass without having issues. The problem with all of that is that the vague nature of how long I can keep moving is triggering my agoraphobia, which usually manifests in a panic attack. Of course the symptoms cause by the panic are basically identical to what happens when I actually am in real physical distress, so I have to guess if they are real, or just in my head.

My family is generally not sympathetic to this. I’m not even sure the Teen is mentally capable of picking up on my signs of distress. Even when I tell her outright that I’m not doing okay she doesn’t seem to grasp it. Of course the feeling of helplessness makes me tetchy which doesn’t help anything because I lose all tolerance for irritating things and want people to instantly understand what I’m trying to tell them. While losing a certain level of eloquence that the situation calls for.

It’s troubling. I’ve tried to go out on a couple of occasions with varying degrees of success. Lack of sleep from trying to adapt to the sleep breathing machine is also contributing to the situation. I’m sleeping much longer than I should because at least 4 hours of any sleep time is basically wasted on having the mask on. I don’t seem to actually sleep while I wear it, so I’m unconscious, but not getting any rest. Then I take the damn thing off and sleep for 6 hours of actual sleep. Making my grand total ten hours of fairly shitty sleep. I aslo think the hose isn’t getting cleaned properly because it smells odd, but nothing I try seems to take the odor away. The mask cleans up just fine, but I think the hose isn’t drying right.

The fucking thing also blows the breaker every so often and I have to go through this whole fucking rigamarole to get the breaker to stay on while it’s plugged in. It only uses 3 amps but the power cord for it draws 12 when it starts. I don’t know why because 12 amps is way higher than anything else I own. It seems like a design flaw to me.

In other news, Satoru Iwata, president of Nintendo, died. He was only 55. It’s incredibly sad because he helped make, or programmed outright some of my favorite games of all time. Earthbound and Animal Crossing in particular, but the list is longer. I played Animal Crossing: City Folk every day for a year while I was having that bout of really insane depression after the first arc of the comic ended. It was an important part of my therapy. This little town where nothing bad ever happened, and everyone was basically nice, gave me a place to center myself every night. Earthbound is just one of my favorite games of all time. There’s nothing else quite like it except for the other games in the series.
Apart from that he was the human face of Nintendo for the last few years. When he started doing the Nintendo Directs he became real in a way that other company presidents never do. He and Reggie make Nintendo human. They made us a family, which is why Nintendo fans make memes of the shit they do, and did. He was in on all the jokes. He was one of us.


The Empty Chair

Eulogy for a Gamer
There is an empty chair,
at the table this day.
A hallowed place where,
a friend once played.
The roll of his dice,
my ears long to hear.
Or perhaps it would suffice,
if he should suddenly appear.
With character sheet in hand,
and a bag of Cheeze-doodles to share.
All his friends would stand,
as he sat in the empty chair.
I hear his voice a-callin’,
and it ties my heart in a knot.
For he cries, “Though a comrade has fallen,
You must play for those who cannot.”
We conquered worlds on the run,
he and I in the name of fun.
And as others may come and go,
I make both both friend and foe.
But what I long for most,
is our past now long a ghost.

50 Comments

Carrots aren’t sexy, huh?

http://www.deviantart.com/art/Titted-Carrot-427535050

That is all, courtesy of JollyJack.

I’m sorry family isn’t being very sympathetic. I had a small stroke 3 years ago and was left with very similar symptoms to yours. My family just doesn’t believe they are there for some reason. I start to lose vision, I speak Incoherently, I have sudden mood changes- and bam! Because I’m dizzy/passing out/etc it’s fake. Welcome to the world of autoimmune diseases- where your reality is crashing/burning and no one recognizes you’re in distress DESPITE telling them :/

I’ve noticed that doctors don’t take it seriously either. I’ve been pretty clear about starting to pass out and it seems to take them by surprise when I actually do.

:( :(
… can you talk to the teen about how this is really shitty of her to not believe you when you tell her? Because that is really really shitty and having no one ever believe you is potentially increasing your stress on this.

it sucks being homebound, but it sounds like you are homebound and your family is trying to send you out anyways. That’s just… so horrible.

Ask for a referral to a cardiologist. It sounds so much like what I had. Most insurances will charge just a copay. This IS serious, especially in summer heat. I’ll send you my info over FB about some things I do to help. Most are free/cheap :)

Good to hear you’re more or less intact. Hoping for more than less as time goes on.

It’s also nice to see Ed and Nina again. Buckling back up for the ride.

Goodness, Nina sure likes to flirt. Glad you are out of the hospital. Panic attacks are horrid things, and I wouldn’t wish them on anyone.
Your leg/temperature disorder doesn’t sound fun either. I hope that improves for you.

It’s great to see that you’re doing well enough for the time being.

Well said with the poem. Would it be okay if I were to screencap it for Facebook?

You’d need to ask the guys at Kenzer. They own that actual content. If you look up Knights Of The Dinner Table you should find the company. I suspect if you use the base link from the link I posted you’ll get there as well.

Welcome back Jackie, you were definitely missed.

Can’t help but notice Nina has the same sort of expression as when she mentioned Magical Nookie, which I think is a big, big clue as to how she’s thinking right now.

Would you have any kind of problem if any fancomics were produced, so you can have a ready supply if you needed it?

She’s not the carrot. She’s the hare. A sexy hare being chased by a tortoise. Heck they have the right colours going. :v

Welcome back, Jackie! Glad to see you back. Take it slow, and things will improve. I know it sounds like a cliche’, but it’s true. Again, glad to see you back.

Poor Ed. Like watching a chihuahua trying to keep up with a Great Dane. And Nina, stop teasing the wee lad like that!

Welcome back, glad you made it out of the hospital, they stink don’t they… We hates them precious, they are tricksy and false.

And yes thank you for the comic, so good to have them and you back again!

We are all very glad to hear you’re getting better, fella. Keep it up and please don’t overreach yourself and have a relapse. I’d rather have less frequent Between Failures if it means you’re recovering.

cheers,
Phil

Hear, hear! We’re glad to have you back, but take care of yourself. Also, Nina is so mean. How much of an advantage in leg length does she have over Ed?

Welcome back Jackie. Take your time getting settled back in. Best wishes for your continued recovery. As a Patreon supporter, I want to let you know that in my mind you more than make up for what I pledge in just being you and pouring yourself out for us in the form of the comic. In fact, I wish I could give more. Maybe if I practice enough I will get good enough to do some fan art to show some of my appreciation for you, because your comic puts a smile on my face even when I’m having a bad day. So, basically, thank you.

I guess Nina is a tough act to follow, but the view from there makes it all worthwhile…

Well, the guest comics have been nice (really nice of them to do ’em, too) but it’s good to see your hand in the game again. Glad to see you’re active once more.

Jackie, glad you’re back at home, best wishes on your road to recovery.

Regarding your comments about the breathing machine – I was on a Constant Positive Airway Pressure breathing machine as therapy for obstructive sleep apnea for a few years. It took me a few weeks to get used to wearing the mask and sleeping, but once I did, the benefits were amazing. It turned out that what I thought was good, restful sleep wasn’t even close to the real thing. Best part was that getting true, restful sleep really helped my weight loss, and eventually the apnea went away, as my BMI went from obese to merely overweight.

I also experienced the weird smell from the breathing machine. My solution was to have the machine run for about a half-hour after I woke up in the morning, to clear out the moisture trapped in the mask and tube from overnight use.

I know nothing about how your CPAP works, but at a guess: It’s got a motor that draws a lot of power when starting up. It’s called “inrush current” and it’s because the motor isn’t moving yet. Sort of like how gas efficiency in your car is crap until it’s moving at speed, it takes a lot of energy to get the motor turning but once it’s going you need less.

Putting it on its own circuit (or changing the breaker) is probably not happening, so at a minimum, if you can turn off other things while the CPAP starts up it could keep the breaker on. Or at least if you can get it on a circuit with a higher trip rating. If you have to stretch a cord out, though, make sure it’s /super beefy/.

If you can beg, borrow, or steal an electrician, he can put in a type of circuit breaker that will tolerate short power spikes like your CPAP causes without tripping.

Good to hear you are feeling somewhat better, hopefully that will continue, and great to see that you are feeling well enough to start drawing again.

Also good to see those two again. Nina is having far too much fun flirting with Ed. However, if she is really throwing out signals to him, and not just teasing, she may have to be waaay less subtle, it appears that Ed is just not picking up on the clues.

Good to have you back, Bud. I’ve been waiting for Nina/Ed for a while. And also wanted to let you know that I really like your fantasy fiction when you post new episodes on the patreon site. I can really see all the BF cast in those characters.

Have you ever thought about getting checked out for MS (Multiple sclerosis). My mother has it and she can’t be in the heat of her legs go numb and will literally give out on her. There are many different symptoms and even ways to treat it, though the treatment can be costly. They have my Mom on pills now, but before they had her giving herself a shot every other day three times a week. Depending on how well the medicine works to stop the nerve damage from spreading, you could actually start to heal and get better, though it wouldn’t be permanent.

I’m glad you are feeling better. Something’s wrong with your doctors if they don’t believe you about panic attacks. You might also need anxiety medicine it can help calm you down when you start to feel overwhelmed. Panic attacks, as well as anxiety attacks, (I’ve suffered from both in the past) can be quite terrifying.

Part of your problem may be the type of mask and headgear. Some put far more pressure on your face. I switched to using g nasal pillows, and they are far more comfortable.

So glad to see you back. Hard to believe how much people can pass off any issues someone has that don’t involve acute blood loss, but then again sympathy is a lesson often taught through experience. Please take care, 2015 has cost us too many good people already it would be heartbreaking to lose you too!

So Ed’s the type who gets literal-minded when exhausted!

Oh this will be fun. Oh wait update: This gets very fun.

Use more than one hose/mask setup at a time. Switch them on a daily basis to allow for a days drying time between uses.

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